Bernie or Bed

Will Bernie Sanders supporters be able to drag themselves out of bed to vote for Hillary Clinton this November? Seems doubtful.

Behind Every Lame Guy

When he was desperate, John McCain picked a woman as his vice presidential candidate. Now Ted Cruz is doing the same thing. Is this becoming a new gambit for Republican guys in trouble?

The Once Future Vice President

Texas Senator Ted Cruz, running a distant second behind Donald Trump for the Republican Presidential nomination, has launched a Hail Mary pass in the form of announcing his pick for vice president, Carly Fiorina, despite the fact that he’s unlikely to win and the convention is still months away.

Unqualified

First Hillary Clinton told a newspaper that Bernie Sanders wasn’t qualified to be president. When he shot back that her judgement made her unqualified, she pretended he’d attacked her out of nowhere. Such are the dynamics of a media narrative: it’s impossible to tell the true truth, only their truth.

Bern the Feel

There were widespread reports of irregularities by the Hillary Clinton campaign in the Nevada and Arizona primaries. In New York State, however, it appears that the Board of Elections illegally purged at least 150,000 voters in the Bernie Sanders stronghold of Brooklyn at the Clinton campaign’s behest…and more in other cities throughout the state.

Pissed Off

North Carolina has passed a law forbidding transgender people from using bathrooms in accordance with their gender identities. It’s time for cis people to join transgender people in a statewide piss-off: peeing and pooping outside!

Suicide Tourism

Canada has legalized doctor-assisted suicide. Now our neighbors to the North are taking steps to discourage suicide tourism by Americans who want to die.

Stairway to Copyright Infringement Heaven

A Los Angeles jury will soon decide whether Led Zeppelin ripped off the Spirit song “Taurus” for their monster hit “Stairway to Heaven.” How would the candidates weigh in?

Thank You For Your Suggestion

The Trump and Sanders insurgencies have inspired many voters to join the primary process. However, many people are dismayed to find out that their vote may not matter due to obscure rules and regulations that vary by state.

Where Hope Goes to Die

HIllary Clinton’s campaign sells her as a competent administrator. But she doesn’t offer any substantial policy changes that would improve Americans’ lives. All she really promises is to try to protect the status quo.

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