Support Ted’s Work

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Ted Rall


Scooter Libby

Because this may not go online until tomorrow (due to the July 4th holiday).

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Ted Rall

Wanted: Flash Animator/Business Partner

I’m looking for a talented, ambitious and imaginative person with experience animating cartoons in Flash to develop and produce a once-per-week animated political cartoon. I provide scripts and artwork; you make them move and talk. Income split is 50-50; details will be discussed if a qualified individual steps forward. You must be patient since it will take some time to market and place animations, but I have a vision for the medium that differs significantly from other editorial cartoons doing animated work that I believe will sell.

Please send your resume, qualifications and any questions to: chet@rall.com. I will respond only to those who I believe may fit the bill; my apologies in advance to the rest.

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Ted Rall

All The President’s Mendacity
posted by TheDon
Dear Carl Bernstein,

I saw you on MSNBC this morning, talking about the Cheney administration in general, and the latest obstruction of justice in particular – the pardon of his former aide, Lewis Libby. You were angry, with good reason, at what you repeatedly called the mendacity of the current administration. You reminded me that you used to be a very good reporter, with the courage to take on a sitting administration, risking your life and liberty.
I can only assume that years of watching your former partner become a wealthy superstar socialite tempted you into cashing in on the right-wing screed industry. Being on the NYT Bestsellers List is heady stuff, and I’m sure it makes up for the years of being out of the spotlight. It probably doesn’t even matter to you that you just added one more volume to the library of hit-jobs on Hillary Clinton, but you must have some memory of being an honorable journalist, doing important work.
I’ve already come up with the title of your new book (hint: it’s the title of this post), and the contents should be self-explanatory. I suggest breaking W’s life into segments and focusing on the major lies, otherwise the book could get longer than The Decider’s face when the White House kitchen runs out of peanut butter. You might have one section for birth until the presidential campaign, you’ll need at least one chapter (maybe two) for the campaign itself, another one for the presidency before 9/11, etc. You’ll probably have to break up the war lies into several chapters. I would suggest one on the lies during the buildup, one for the lies about “progress” and “strategy”, and a separate chapter for the lies about the original lies, and the coverups.
The lies are well documented, and all you have to do is organize them (which I’ve started for you), and write interestingly about them – which is your profession, after all. This should be a big seller, and it could have almost endless chapters added in subsequent releases. You could even turn it into a PBS series, with each of the administration officials getting their own night. Call Ken Burns and see what his schedule is like.
No need to thank me, just get moving on this. You have a reputation to recapture.

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Ted Rall

DC Rall-tastic Event Tonight: 7/3 Cartoonapalooza Cocktails w/ Rall, Toles, Knight, Bolling, Fiore and more!
Posted by Mikhaela Reid


Cartoons & Cocktails and the Association of American Editorial Cartoonists Present:

Cartoonapalooza: Fireworks in Pen and Ink!

Meet prize-winning political cartoonists from across the country as they discuss their most controversial cartoons.

Why did Tom Toles of The Washington Post get dressed down by the Joint Chief of Staff? How did Ted Rall invoke the wrath of a legion of 9/11 widows? Why did a Mercedes-Benz dealership in Atlanta take out a half-page ad to apologize for a Mike Luckovich cartoon? Meet ten of the nation’s best political cartoonists as they discuss their most controversial cartoons. Cartoonapalooza, the kick-off event for the 50th anniversary convention of the Association of American Editorial Cartoonists (AAEC), is a rare opportunity for the public to meet prize-winning political cartoonists from across the country as they discuss their most controversial cartoons. Join Tom Toles, Ted Rall, Mike Peters, Mike Luckovich, Rob Rogers and five other brilliant, ground-breaking editorial artists as they talk politics, the election, Bush and beyond. The public is invited to a cocktail reception before the panel discussion to meet the artists.

The proceeds from this event will go to support Newspapers In Education’s “Cartoons for the Classroom” program, a non-profit program that provides editorial cartoon-related lesson plans for teachers. Cartoonapalooza is the must-attend event of the year for all political buffs and cartoon afficionados!

Door prizes at the reception will include signed original cartoons and books.

Featured Cartoonists:

  • Ted Rall, Universal Press Syndicate
  • Tom Toles, Washington Post
  • Mike Luckovich, Atlanta Journal Constitution
  • Mike Peters, Dayton Daily News
  • Rob Rogers, Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
  • Jack Ohman, The Oregonian
  • Ruben Bolling, Tom the Dancing Bug
  • Ann Telnaes, Cartoonists and Writers Syndicate
  • Keith Knight, The K-Chronicles
  • Mark Fiore, Animated Political Cartoonist

DC Rall-tastic event #2 is, of course, the free Cartoonists With Attitude Slideshow at Borders at 2 p.m. on 7/7/2007. More on that in another post.

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Ted Rall

Newly rescued orange Manx kitty Octavia
Posted by Mikhaela Reid


Rescued Orange Manx Kitty: Octavia
Originally uploaded by M1khaela.

I figured since TheDon has rescued dogs covered in this blog, I’d throw a rescued cat into the mix.

My cartoonist fiancé Masheka and I are off to Washington, DC for the 50th Anniversary Convention of the Association of American Editorial Cartoonists. We’ll be hanging out with the Cartoonists With Attitude crew (AAEC Vice President Ted Rall, plus Keith Knight, Jen Sorensen, Matt Bors, Brian McFadden, Stephanie McMillan, Ruben Bolling, August Pollak, Ben Smith) and a huge convention of famous-type editorial cartoonists (Tom Toles, Joel Pett, Clay Bennett, Signe Wilkinson, Rob Rogers and many many more!) plus special guests like Tom Tomorrow, Duncan Black and the Comics Curmudgeon. I may even bring a laptop and blog about some of the panels.

In our absence, I leave you with this photo of our newly rescued cat, Octavia, kneading me with her claws as I try to finish up the Cartoonists With Attitude Slideshow for our event this Saturday.

We’ve felt for a while that our other cat Riley was lonely and just too friendly and social and playful to stay home by himself while we’re at work. A rescue group in our neighborhood saved this little orange fuzzball from the euthanasia queue at Animal Care and Control. We barely had her home for a few hours before she decided she had to sit in one of our laps 24/7.

We named her Octavia to (a) pay tribute to the late great science fiction writer Octavia Butler and because (b) she seems like one of the weird alien creatures from Ms. Butler’s books, with her giant orange eyes, her taillessness (she’s a Manx cat, and apparently this is how many of them are born) and her weird bunny-style gait.

Her political affiliations are yet to become clear, but hopefully she’ll be more progressive than our other cat.

I must add that lazy and unapologetic as other other cat is, he’d never have pardoned Scooter Libby.

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Ted Rall

Mo’ Dogs
posted by TheDon
This week, nine more of our little friends found their forever homes, including this little girl. This is the kind of thing that helps keep me sane and gives me hope. A nice impeachment would help. Two would cure me for life.

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Ted Rall

ITMFA – Libby Edition
posted by TheDon

The Bush Crime Family has now gamed the system so that Scooter won’t testify against his old boss Dick, and we’ll never hear the truth from Libby’s lying lips. For once he is following in dear old dad’s footsteps by using his presidential pardon powers to protect himself and his boss Dick.
This is another attack on the rule of law and the separation of powers by this oulaw regime. It’s time to take the gloves off and ITMFA. Now. This won’t be the last abuse of this power to protect his buddies, either. Watch for some rather broad pardons in January, 2009. GRRRRRRR.
So now what? Now there is no “ongoing investigation”, so it’s time for Congress to start up the hearings and subpeona the executive and find out who outed a CIA agent. If they don’t cooperate? ITMFA.
And where is the press? It’s time to start pressing the president again over who leaked, and why they still have security clearances. Press him on his claim that he would fire anyone connected. Push, people! Push!

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Ted Rall
The One Percent Solution
posted by TheDon
Ronald Suskind’s The One Percent Doctrine is out in paperback, and it is being re-examined by the right. The One Percent Doctrine is a philosophy espoused by Dick Cheney in the aftermath of 9/11 which says basically that if there is a 1% chance that a country will attack us or acquire WMD, then we have to treat it as a certainty that they will and attack first. These bed-wetters, newly frightened by terror attacks in London, are openly asking if the current policy of OPD is a good idea (they tend to think yes). If we can stop these scary brown people who don’t even believe in the baby Jesus by killing other brown people who don’t believe in the baby Jesus, well, that seems fair.
This conversation, while not entirely useless, misses the point entirely. Asking if the OPD is proper beggars the real question. The real question is this: “Is the One Percent Doctrine really driving US foreign policy?”. I don’t think so, I think it’s just cover for whatever actions they want to take. Any proposition, no matter how nutty, can be argued to have a 1% possibility of happening.
OPD is not the reason we attacked Iraq, it’s not the reason we are going to attack Iran, it’s not why I can’t carry shaving cream on a flight, it’s not why we have GITMO, it’s not why we are being wire-tapped, it’s not why every move we make electronically is being tracked. If you’re scoring at home, the answers are: oil, oil, spread fear, small penises, blackmail, marketing opportunities. Not OPD.
A country truly driven by OPD would have teamed up with India to jump Pakistan, and then teamed up with Saddam Hussein to knock out Saudi Arabia and with Israel against whomever was next. It would have secured all of its borders and ports and inspected all the food coming in from around the world. It would have spent every red cent it had in the bank to lock up the loose nuclear material around the world. It would have encouraged and helped the Russians knock out the Chechen uprising. We would have bribed a bunch of governments to help us monitor their problem areas (I’m looking at YOU, Philippines!)
We did none of those things (except the bribing part), or anything else which suggests that we are serious about fighting terrorism. We scared our citizens, killed other countries’ citizens, and pissed away a river of money and goodwill, with the end result being a lot more terrorists in the world who are willing to die to kill an American.
So is OPD a good doctrine for us? No, of course not. It’s sociopathy on an international level, but that’s not the point. It’s NOT our doctrine, never was, never will be. It’s just an excuse for whatever criminal activity springs from the well-fertilized minds of this administration.

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Ted Rall

ITMFA – VP edition
posted by TheDon

The Sunday chuckleheads seemed endlessly amused by that whacky VP and his unconstitutional antics. We are not amused. When the phrase “Nixonian stonewalling” seems inadequate to describe an administration, and when the VP shows such contempt for congress that he doesn’t even try to justify his activities anymore, it’s time to act. My mother used to say “If you act like Nixon, I’m going to treat you like Nixon”, or something like that. It’s time to treat this administration like the outlaw enemies of the Constitution that they are, and I’m not just talking about Congress. The MIA stenographer press corps needs to step up to the plate and earn their constitutionally protected status.

I hear people that I respect making the argument that impeachment is only an option, and that it would be a distraction from the Democratic legislative agenda.

Defending the Constitution is NOT an optional exercise, it is an oath that every congresscritter swore. There is no longer any doubt that these people are an ongoing threat to our Constitution, and to the lives and freedoms of people around the world. Their sneering contempt for the legislative branch and the people they represent has to be answered with force, and the biggest power congress has is the power to impeach.

And I have to ask… WHAT Democratic legislative agenda? I know there is one, but not one which will ever pass with the current Senate or President. Nothing of substance will pass the Senate (or even reach the floor), and if something accidentally passes, President Numbnuts has finally found the veto pen.

These guys are stonewalling because it’s the only way to make it to January 2009 still in office. It’s time to stand up for the people and their Constitution. An impeachment can even be a proxy war-crimes trial. I think the public would cheer on any process to get these criminals out of office, even if it eventually fails in the Senate. But I think that any Senator who refuses to vote for conviction on the serious crimes commited by this administration will be tossed out.

ITMFA – and the VP he rode in on.

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Ted Rall

Sunday Funnies
posted by TheDon

Meat The Press

Chertoff on TERROR in LONDON!!!
I guess England isn’t fighting them over there hard enough.
Weird… Chertoff first says we don’t know if there is “an international link”, then says, “And as far as the Homeland is concerned, we do not see any specific connection to the Homeland at this point in time.”
This is a complete 180 on administration policy. I thought every evil thought came from Al-Qeda, and every bomb was built by OBL himself. And this whole “Homeland” schtick still sounds a bit pre-1940’s Germany to me.
Chertoff says that in light of the activities in England that they is going to be “surging of our air marshall capabilities”. Sigh. It’s like their hearts aren’t even in to scaring us that much anymore. But he does remind us that AQ is still talking about attacking us. Heightened sense of awareness, blah blah. You know it’s just killing these guys that AQ won’t attack us here. They are sure that every attack is worth one more republican president.
Timmeh asks Chertoff if he’s surprised that we don’t get hit harder by car bombs, etc. MC “reminds” him that we were hit by a car bomb – in 1993 at the World Trade Center! And by Timmothy McVeigh! Hilarious! I think he just made Timmeh’s point for him.
MC praises vigilance by ordinary citizens. Doesn’t bring up wiretapping, break-ins and mail snatching. hmmmm….
And now Leahy.
Timmeh asks about subpeonas affecting our national security. Leahy squashes that bit of silliness. Timmeh seems to struggle with the concept of “legal” versus “illegal”. “Checks and balances” makes him cock his head like a dog listening to algebra. He pretends not to understand the phrase “Nixonian stonewalling”. Leahy indulges him with civics 101, and calls out Gonzo. Nice.
Timmeh: What does “full force of the law” mean? Are we headed to a Constitutional Crisis.
A: No, we’re already there. Get comfortable, we’re gonna be there for a while. (Actually, Leahy says that he hopes not.)
Timmeh presents Fred Fielding’s BS letter as a good offer. Leahy deconstructs it and mocks it. Sweet. Timmeh presents a hypothetical which won’t happen. Leahy is a very, very patient man. He mentions that the next Gonzo appearance will be an “open book exam” – the questions submitted a week ahead. Bold prediction: this will NOT help his “memory”.
Leahy give his excuse for voting for John Roberts, and admits that he is “extraordinarily disappointed” with the cavalier way Brown V. Board was thrown aside, among other things. Yeah. Welcome to our world. Turns out Roberts is exactly who we said he is. Duh.
Round Table with some fucktard David Brody from the Christian Broadcasting Network? WTF?!?!?
Immigration defeat. Yeah. I’ll cry myself to sleep for a couple of weeks over that. With a Democratic president, and more/better Democrats in congress we’ll get a much better bill. We have to solve the problem, but not on the terms of the Chamber of Commerce.
Brody hits the righty talking points that W isn’t a conservative. Riiiiiiiight.
Timmeh asks Tavis Smiley about Obama vs Clinton, esp in the African-American community. Nice. I’m sure it wasn’t because he’s Black. Positive, in fact.
Obama is raising a lot more primary money that Hillary, and with a huge number of donors. This is going to be an interesting race. Two flawed candidates, both of them far superior to anyone on the other side.
People tell the Mason-Dixon poll that they wouldn’t vote for Hillary under any circumstances. Yeah. What if the opponent is Giuliani? I thought so.
hillaryis44.com – anonymous insider site which trashes Obama. Fun! Look for lots more like this before this cycle is over.
Kids 17-29 strongly prefer Dems, esp Hillary and Obama. Nothing like a war, even without a draft, to keep people away from the GOOPs. And gay-bashing. And immigrant-bashing. Race baiting. etc.
Giuliani has flip-flopped on gay rights and abortion. Call Mike Wallace. But the righties have figured out that picking judges is important, so he’s playing that song loud. And 9/11, 9/11, 9/11.
Brody admits that evangelicals like simple-minded black/white right/wrong people, and Rudy is like that. ugh. Two terms of that has been more than enough, thank you.
56% of Iowa Republicans want all troops out of Iraq within six months. Just damn. Iowa.
Evangelical leaders are ready to take down Rudy. But…but…but… who will they support? The Mormon? The lobbyist womanizer? The straight-out-the-ass talker? Who? Maybe they can run Pat Robertson again. Or maybe Brownback? Huckabee? George Allen isn’t busy… This could actually be car-wreck fun.
The CIA released the “family jewels”. Wow! I’m glad they don’t spy on Americans or kidnap people anymore! What dark days have passed!

Fawkes News

Topics: Terror! Immigration reform is dead! How can we protect the border? The Fairness Doctrine. Hey! Mark Green! I’ll have to watch that segment. But not Chertoff again today.
(fast-forward)
The Fairness Doctrine. I’ll admit I don’t care that much because it’s not going to happen any more than the Amnesty Bill was going to pass. But I will watch for Air America owner Mark Green, since I subscribe to his network’s podcasts. To clarify – I would care a great deal if I thought anyone’s First Ammendment rights were in danger, but they aren’t. Now if they want to get back to diversifying media ownership, I’m in, but we won’t see that until the next president. This just sounds like more ginning up the base because them libruls are after Rush. Yawn.
Kewl. Mark Green brings in the truth to combat Wallace and some other grinning right-wing idiot named Mike Gallagher. Everyone but Green sticks to the lie that this is a real issue that someone is trying to push into law. Wallace is a snotty little bitch who doesn’t want Green talking about his views, just the strawman. As usual. Green’s against censorship and monopolies. 1,000 hours to zero conservative vs liberal talk doesn’t seem “fair and balanced” to Green.
Roundtable
The Supreme Court has turned to the right. Suprise! Who could have seen that coming? Except, you know, everybody NOT in the Senate Democratic caucus.
Everyone agrees that the Supremes are singing out of the right sides of their mouths. A string of 5-4 decisions will do that. Kristol can’t stop grinning.
Juan thinks this court would have been different with Gonzo and Meirs on it instead of Roberts and Alito. I suspect it would have been much more right-wing, with three numb-nuts (Gonzo, Meirs and Thomas) following Scalia’s lead, with Kennedy giving them 5-4 decisions. I never thought I would miss Sandra Day O’Connor this much.
Kristol is so giddy that you have to suspect that’s he’s been “celebrating” the court decisions. A lot.
Amnesty is still dead. Hume is happy. Everyone seems surprised that Bush didn’t go for “border security first”. Guess what. W does NOT care about border security, even a little. He only cares about getting the Chamber of Commerce some cheap labor. Period. Why would he agree to pay for a fence when it might cut off the cheap labor, and no guest-worker program?
I agree with Juan (and W) that this must be done comprehensively, but the smell of bigotry was strong on this issue. Let’s just wait until we can control the issue and get the bill we want.
Brit points out that the conversations he hears don’t mention “Mexicans” or “Latinos”, but “illegals”, so it wasn’t racist. Ummmm… yeah… most people understand that naked bigotry won’t win many arguments, so they use the code. Guess what – when they said “illegal” they weren’t talking about Bosnians, or Irish immigrants, or Brits, or Ozzies. They meant the brown ones.
Power Player
Oh. My. God. Grover Norquist. Thanks for giving a platform to Mr Drown It In A Bathtub. In fairness, he is a power player, and not a museum curator.

This Weak

Terror in London. Amnesty RIP. Dick Lugar opposes the War. Chertoff and Lieberman. The Supreme Court. This is gonna be fast. The roundtable has Bay Buchanan?!?! ugh. But it is fun to watch Donna Brazile chew her up and spit her out.
First Chertoff – (fast forward)
Now Lieberman. You know how the first ff gets you 4X, then 15X, 60X, and finally 300X? I need one even faster for this lying tool.
Ok, I had to listen. As expected, things are just now turning around (again), and we should give them a chance (again). Maybe he’s like the guy in Memento, with no short-term memory. He seems fascinated with the “new” strategy of clear, build and hold. Yeah. New. I know. Bless his heart. He’s never going to agree to get out of Iraq.
(fast forward)
Panel time
The Supremes. Donna Brazile calls Roberts’ words Orwellian. Nice. She’s worked up in the best possible way. Bay is, of course, thrilled with stopping all that discrimination against white children. Cokie makes a pitch for better public schools. Hear, hear!
Everybody thinks these decisions will focus the public on the consequences of picking a president, and who gets on the court. The bad news is that none of the righties are likely to resign soon, except maybe Kennedy.
Cheney. Everyone seems amused by that zany, magnificent bastard. Bay is in awe.
Executive priviledge. Comparisons between Clinton and W. Yawn. This is going to court, and won’t be over until he’s out of office.
Bay says it just looks like the Dems are going after W on all of these issues trying to bring him down, and it’s killing them in the polls. I don’t really remember this argument being made by her side in the 90’s. Even a little.
Skank Coulter, the crack-whore of the GOOPs. Ick.
More primary stuff. Yawn.
If you have an erection longer than 4 hours call a doctor. That might have been a commercial.
In Memoriam
Liz Clairborne.
John J Flynt (GA congressman)
Joel Siegel (movie reviewer)
33 service members (average age – 25, median age – 23)
Voice – James Earl Jones is teaching kids about literacy.
funnies
curtain
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