The good news is, Wankette resumes comix crit. The bad news is, the critter is worse than his victims.

To most reasonably intelligent readers, the incredibly sloppy writing and transparently inconsistent logic of Matthew Phelan’s critique of editorial cartooning render his opinions unworthy of serious attention. But this is the Internet, where most readers are neither reasonable nor intelligent. So some effort at restoring balance to the universe is called for.

First Phelan goes after Steve Sack, cartoonist for the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, who won the Pulitzer Prize last year. As I wrote at the time, “Sack has been around a long time, is a nice, unassuming guy who is personally popular among the older generation of “mainstream” editorial cartoonists, so his win has been largely greeted as long overdue, sort of a lifetime achievement award as these things often are, a recognition of the fact that unlike many other political cartoonists who slavishly copied the artistic style of deceased Chicago Tribune cartoonist Jeff MacNelly, Steve developed his own drawing style.”

What Phelan appears to be trying to say, and if he is I agree with him, is that Sack’s cartoons are bland. And that bland shouldn’t win the biggest prize in journalism. To be honest, I think the Pulitzer Committee embarrassed itself with their selection. If he’d won at the peak of his career, about 15 years ago, there would have been fewer WTFs. As it is…well.

Sadly, Phelan resorts to rhetorical devices that are stupid and sleazy.

For example, Phelan points to a Sack cartoon from the build-up to war against Iraq that supports Bush’s pro-war position by depicting Saddam as a liar about WMDs. Obviously, Sack was wrong to believe Bush. So were most of my colleagues. And look, I fucking hate that cartoon. Along with most mainstream cartoonists, Sack has blood on his hands because his cartoon helped contribute to the political shift from “let’s not invade” to “no, let’s.”

But it’s a cheap shot. Peruse the archives of any cartoonist or political commentator and you’ll find stuff that makes them look bad — stuff they wish they could take back. Expecting a humorist to bat 1.000 is asking way too much.

Still, I don’t have too much trouble with his conclusion: “That, in brief, is the problem with Steve Sack,” says Phelan: “Like an antique weathervane, Sack’s cartooning is quaint, inoffensive, and deeply American — and more-or-less an adequate indicator of which way the wind is blowing.” This is true, of course, of the work of 90% of American editorial cartoonists.

Then he turns on your humble narrator.

He begins by calling me “Ted ‘Theodore’ Rall.” Yes. Ted is usually short for Theodore. This made me flashback to George L. Ernst Elementary School, where my dimmer classmates would rhyme: “Red Ted lies dead in bed.” Then they’d stare at me, wondering why I was neither impressed nor offended. I assume Wonkette doesn’t have editors or paid staff; otherwise, who signed off on this?

At this point, I should apologize for burying the lede. But here, we’re getting to it now.

Phelan calls my cartoon showcasing quotes from former USAF drone operator Heather Linebaugh “a nasty, sanctimonious piece of business.” Well, OK. Opinions are like assholes, etc.

Here’s the thing, Mr. Phelan: cartoons can be bland, or they can be hard-hitting. Edgy work may make some people uncomfortable. It may even offend them. In other words, you can’t reasonably attack Sack for being too bland in the same essay in which you criticize me for being too not-bland. Well, you can, but then, someone will write something like this, pointing out that you have written something stupid.

When done right — and most cartoonists don’t even try to do it right anymore — political cartooning is a blood sport. It’s ball-grabbing, throat-crushing, bile-inducing. Like some Chinese guy said about revolution, it is not polite, it is not a dinner party. A good political cartoon — or a cartoon that has a chance of being considered good — takes no prisoners, pulls no punches, and is perfectly willing to be nasty and sanctimonious in the service of an important cause (e.g., trying to convince Americans to end the drone murders).

Damned fucking right I’m sanctimonious.

P.S. Turns out Matthew Phelan is a children’s book illustrator with a twee, not terribly confident, style. And a truly crappy website.

Elected officials make not even the slightest attempt to represent the interests of the American people in NSA scandals

Congressman in NSA reform “debate” admit that they never seriously considered eliminating the telephone metadata program, only trying to figure out who should keep the data – the NSA, the phone companies, or a third-party? Meanwhile, most Americans want to get rid of it entirely. Nice democracy you got there.
http://swampland.time.com/2014/01/09/obama-discusses-potential-nsa-reforms-with-congressmen

TIME Magazine goes on a slut-shaming bender

Check out this incredibly icky slut-shaming article that cites – get this – Lena Dunham as a leading feminist:
http://ideas.time.com/2014/01/09/in-defense-of-smart-women-who-fall-for-jerks

LOS ANGELES TIMES CARTOON: Patient Dumping? I Have a Solution For That.

Patient Dumping? We Can Fix That

 

I draw cartoons for The Los Angeles Times about issues related to California and the Southland (metro Los Angeles).

This week:

“In 2005 and 2006, patient dumping on L.A.’s skid row grabbed national headlines with images of mentally ill patients in hospital gowns, one holding a colostomy bag, being dropped off in ambulances, taxis and vans,” Richard Winton of The Times remembers. Major hospitals, including Kaiser Permanente, were forced to admit routinely driving indigent patients downtown, dumping them on the sidewalk and speeding off. “Hospitals don’t like dealing with homeless patients, who are often uninsured and sometimes unpleasant to treat. So they literally dump them on the streets of Skid Row, even if the patients come from other places in Los Angeles, and are in no condition to fend for themselves,” “60 Minutes” reported in 2007.

Most people thought the problem had abated since hospitals got slapped with major fines.

Alas, we were wrong.

“In a settlement announced Friday, the 224-bed Beverly Hospital in Montebello agreed to pay $250,000 in civil penalties and legal fees after it was accused of taking a patient by taxi to skid row and leaving her there without making any arrangements with a shelter,” Winton reports.

Charming.

So Los Angeles City Attorney Mike Feuer says he’s going after this miscreants.

Which brings me into the picture. I want to help!

For a hospital like Beverly, a quarter million bucks is a drop in the bucket. It’s cheaper for them to pay the occasional penalty than to give proper care to every patient who walks or rolls through the ER doors. From now on, therefore, I humbly suggest that when cops and homeless shelters come across a case of patient dumping, they take the person to the hospital’s CEO. In Beverly Hospital’s case, that would be Gary Kipp.

I’m guessing that Kipp, with an annual salary of $400,000 that safely ensconces him in the top 1%, has a sweet crib with lots of spare room for sofa surfers. Maybe CEO Kipp can take in some of the nurses he is underpaying and refusing to let unionize, as well.

SYNDICATED COLUMN: You’ll Get Arrested Someday. Will You Survive?

Are you male? The odds say you’ll be arrested by the police at least once.

What happens to Americans after the cops slap on the cuffs, therefore, is not an intellectual exercise, or a matter of liberal guilt. It doesn’t just happen to other people.

You. It could happen to you.

It’s happened to me twice in the United States, and more times than I can count in foreign dictatorships. (In Third World countries, it’s usually corrupt cops shaking you down for a bribe.) On each occasion, I was thunderstruck by an overwhelming sense of helplessness.

No one knew where I was.

I was trapped.  Think this is a democracy? Think again. Whether you’re in Turkmenistan or the United States, victims of arrest are every bit as “disappeared” as if they were living under Orwell’s dystopian Big Brother.

Your family doesn’t know where you are.

You don’t show up to work — so you might lose your job.

If you need medication to live, you may die because the cops won’t give it to you.

When I was arrested, the policemen could have done anything they wanted to me — beat me up, rape me, even murder me — and get away with it. They didn’t. But they could.

That’s not a good feeling.

It’s certainly not a feeling you should have to experience for trivial offenses. (My case #1: arrested for possession of marijuana. Not mine. My friend’s. Because he was in the same car as me when I got pulled over for forgetting to turn on my headlights at night. My case #2: pulled over for speeding. Arrested for a suspended license. Which had been suspended in error.)

This kind of thing should not be a death sentence. A Justice Department study found that more than 2,000 criminal suspects died in police custody over a three-year period. Fifty-five percent were ruled as homicides by police officers.

Christopher J. Mumola, who authored the study, notes that most people make it out physically unharmed. “Keep in mind we have 2,000 deaths out of almost 40 million arrests over three years, so that tells you by their nature they are very unusual cases,” said Mumola.

But that’s still too many. And jail is still a gratuitously terrible experience. Guaranteed constitutional rights — to legal representation, a speedy trial and to communicate with the outside world –are routinely denied. Detectives bully and harangue suspects past the limit of human endurance, frequently extracting false confessions from innocent men and women. Basic needs, including access to medication, are often ignored.

Some conservatives will counter that the police shouldn’t coddle suspects. That if you do the crime, be prepared to do the time. But that’s precisely the point: under U.S. law, suspects haven’t done any crime. Until a judge or jury delivers a guilty verdict, arrestees are innocent under the law.

The Miranda decision — the last major reform that improved life for those who get arrested — is a half-century old. It’s time to update the rules to bring the experience of getting arrested in line with the high-flying rhetoric of human rights enshrined under U.S. law and with common decency.

You have the right to communicate.

     Or you should. In New York City, for example, suspects being processed through Central Booking are supposed to be allowed to place three local phone calls for free. In New York and most other municipalities, this right is routinely delayed.

“Disappearing” people is unworthy of a modern nation-state. It’s also dangerous. What happens to children waiting for their parents to pick them up after school when they don’t show up?

“Prepare yourself and your family in case you are arrested. Memorize the phone numbers of your family and your lawyer,” advises the ACLU. But in the age of the cellphone, many people don’t know important phone numbers by heart.

Suspects should be permitted to keep their cellphones, and use them as much as they want, while waiting to be indicted or released.

     You have the right to your meds.

Cops are extraordinarily cavalier about the health of the people they arrest. Members of Occupy Wall Street arrested in 2011 reported that jail guards in Manhattan routinely jeopardized their health. “At one point,” wrote Dave Korn, “the cops wheeled out a stretcher holding one of our girls; she was lying motionless, oxygen tubes connected to her face.  She had been denied her medication and was now unconscious.  The stretcher was left in the hallways, and cops were either walking past or photographing her.” A 22-year-old Washington state man was arrested for misdemeanor marijuana possession and sent to jail. He told the authorities that he had an extreme food allergy. Cops fed him oatmeal anyway, and told him it was safe. “Over the next half hour, the video shows other inmates looking in Saffioti’s cell as he jumped up and down. The legal claim says he pressed his call button and was ignored,” reported local TV. He died.

Congress should pass a federal law guaranteeing Americans’ right to keep their medications with them if they’re arrested, as well as access to food conforming to their medical, dietary and religious needs.

You have the right to be speedily processed.

Anyone arrested in the U.S. is entitled to respect. Which includes the right to be charged or released quickly. In many jurisdictions, the 24-hour rule before seeing a judge is ignored — especially if you’re nabbed on a Friday night. Then it goes to 72 hours. Which is stupid. Jails don’t suspend business over weekends. Neither should the courts.

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Dem in name only

Democratic Party has already decided not to have real primaries if Hillart runs. Thus: zero voice for liberals and progressives within the system.

http://wapo.st/JFpRcN

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