Generalissimo El Busho’s Stomping Grounds
If you’re in New Haven tomorrow night, you may want to drop by the Yale Political Union to hear me speak on my assertion that the national security needs of the United States would best be served by an immediate withdrawal from Iraq. There will be a short speech (OK, short to me and long to you), followed by a (I hope) lively question-and-answer section.
I’m almost done with my next book. I expect to turn it into the publisher in a little over a week. Galleys come out in January, then the book itself in March 2004.
Titled WAKE UP, YOU’RE LIBERAL, this is my most ambitious project to date. It’s 100 percent prose, no cartoons whatsoever, and it’s probably going to weigh in at about 250 to 300 pages.
A number of others have published Bush-bashing books in recent months (Michael Moore, Al Franken, Molly Ivins, Jim Hightower) but WAKE UP, YOU’RE LIBERAL isn’t in the same vein as those. Long frustrated at the cartoon and column format because their limited space only allows you to look at one tiny aspect of one issue at a time, this book is my first attempt to present the direction I think the left should take to take back the country from the extreme right, obviously filtered through the lens of my personal political philosophy. (Liberals and conservatives will both be surprised, I think…some pleasantly, some not.)
I’ve relied on my experience working on political campaigns and conducted extensive research to formulate a cohesive platform, campaign methodology and constructive suggestions that I believe will allow liberals to regain their previous strength by appealing to neglected and alienated constituencies. It all starts from my belief that Americans believe in liberal values–they just don’t know it.
Until a month ago, I wasn’t sure that this project was going to turn out well, but now that it’s nearly done I can’t believe how excited I am. Will people buy it? I don’t know…I never know these things in advance. Certainly people concerned about the direction of our country, those who wonder about the dangers of a system dominated by one political party and anyone looking for a “middle way” between PC liberalism and corporate conservatism will find WAKE UP interesting. I do know that I’m proud as hell to have written a cohesive summary of my political philosophy and that it nearly killed me.
I’ll post advance ordering information here on the blog as well as on my website as soon as it becomes available. If you’d like me to add you to my mailing list for information about WAKE UP, YOU’RE LIBERAL or ATTITUDE 2: THE NEW SUBVERSIVE SOCIAL COMMENTARY CARTOONISTS, also due out in early 2004, please send me an e-mail.
If you or someone you know is a book reviewer or bookstore buyer, or someone interested in bringing me to their town to sign books and/or give a talk in the spring and summer of 2004, send me an e-mail and I’ll put you on the list to receive a galley for review.
More Proof that Reagan’s Education Budget Cuts Paid Off
I said I wouldn’t do this, but hey–I’m allowed to break a promise to myself, right?
While I was trying to enjoy a few well-deserved days off, the lunatic right was working itself into a weird frenzy over my column from last week, “Why We Fight.”
The right-wing blog Instapundit joined fascist self-hater Andrew Sullivan and other got-no-life types in imagining that piece, written from the standpoint of an Iraqi resistance leader, to be a reflection of my desire to see American troops killed in Iraq.
Haven’t these fools ever heard of writing from another viewpoint? Obviously not. So here’s a few things for them to keep in mind:
1. I am not a member of the Iraqi resistance.
2. I do not hope or pray for US troops to suffer in any way, shape or form.
3. When I write an essay, it doesn’t reflect what I personally believe unless the context makes that explicit.
The purpose of the piece, as most smart readers discerned, was to put myself in the position of someone fighting the US occupation to see what motivates them. It was a response to the apparent confusion that Iraqis who love us so much are so deadset on sending so many of us to meet Allah. As someone else (Krugman, maybe) pointed out, no nation-state has invaded another–and kept it–successfully during the 20th century. Wars of resistance have always won eventually. I don’t think Iraq will be an exception.
Sooner or later, we’ll pull out. Why not get it over with now, and save ourselves a lot of blood and money?
Why and How Bush Lost, Part XLVIII
Among the many petty annoyances that plague my life are the idiotic emails from conservatives who write to ask: “Don’t you Democrats understand the electoral college? Bush won the electoral college; the popular vote doesn’t matter. He’s the legitimate winner.”
Of course, you pinheads, we understand the electoral college system. What you don’t seem to understand is that Al Gore won Florida. He actually won Florida several ways:
Legally: Since the US Supreme Court, a federal body, doesn’t have jurisdictions over election disputes–state courts are the highest arbiters of elections–it didn’t have the right to hear Bush v. Gore. Even had its manipulations of Florida’s recount resulted in Al Gore being appointed president, then Al Gore would be illegitimate, and by definition George W. Bush would be president. The Supremes had no business involving themselves in this matter.
Through the Recount: 7 of 8 counting methods show that Gore won the newspaper-run recounts. The 8th method was the one that Bush sued to prevent. A state-wide recount, which fair-minded individuals agree would have been the best resolution, would have given Florida to Gore.
Because of Electoral Fraud: Gore actually carried Florida by anywhere from 200,000 to 400,000 votes, depending on whose estimate carries the day. He wins by a significant amount if you discount the fraudulent/late military ballots, add the African-Americans who were stopped by the cops from voting and discount the Buchanan Jews of butterfly-ballot fame.
Unfortunately there have been some Democrats who stupidly insist on rehashing the canard about Gore carrying the popular vote. That’s not the point. The point is that Gore won the electoral vote, too.
Now that that’s settled, Gov. Bush, would you please get the fuck out of Al Gore’s house? I keep waiting for some smart liberal resident of Washington DC to file eviction papers on Bush. We can’t impeach him since we wasn’t elected in the first place; the dude is, after all, little more than a squatter.
I’ll be away from the blog until the end of the month.
Speaking Engagements
This is to respond to a number of emails I’ve received:
Yes, I do speaking gigs. In fact, I love ’em! Anything to get out of the house, you know? I can talk about cartooning, Afghanistan, Iraq, the crimes of the Bush Administration, you name it. My typical gig involves showing my cartoons on a projection screen, following that up with a talk, and then doing a back-and-forth Q&A session with the audience.
If you’re interested in having me speak somewhere, please bear in mind the following:
I won’t do the assignment unless it’s properly promoted. That means ads in the local alternative weekly and daily newspaper, as well as listings (they’re not the same thing). This is for your own good; leaving flyers at the local bookstore won’t get you the crowd you’re hoping for either.
I charge a flat honorarium for all appearances outside of the New York metro area (an hour or less drive from Manhattan). If you’re a low-budget peace group in Portland, you may work with a local college or university, or the alt weekly, to go in on funding the honorarium. This seems to work out pretty well.
I also ask for round-trip first-class airfare to gigs away from NYC. While it’s true that I’m used to roughing it in the fiendish skies–Air Tajikistan’s first class is like cargo here in the States–I don’t HAVE to to do speaking gigs and won’t put my 6’2″ frame through any more abuse than necessary.
One way to save costs is to piggyback my appearance on one I’m already making. If you see here that I’m already coming to your town and want me to chat to your group, let me know and perhaps we can work out something for less than my usual expenses.
In the last year I’ve spoken at Truman State University in Kirksville MO, Carnegie-Mellon University in Pittsburgh, Lima High School in Lima OH and I’m getting ready for an appearance at the Yale Political Union in New Haven CT.
Bush’s Tumbling Poll Numbers
After peaking out at 90 percent popularity after 9/11, just 44 percent of the American people want to see Bush reelected (OK, elected) next year. On the one hand, this is a very good thing. We need, after all, to start cleaning up his mess as soon as possible, and the war crimes trials will take a while.
On the other hand, am I the only one who doesn’t have time for Americans who are just now waking up to the fact that this Administration is full of fascists, charlatans and other treasonous scum? What were those 46 percent who changed their mind between 9/11 and now thinking? Idiots all, that’s for sure.
Using Jessica Lynch
I was afraid that the story of Jessica Lynch’s setting the story straight would disappear in a day or two, and it has. What is it about the Bushite-era media that it can’t nurture a potential scandal?
Some of the highlights to air in an ABC “Primetime” special with Diane Sawyer (what, “60 Minutes” wasn’t interested?) include:
US military allegations that she was anally raped are untrue. (Now they say she forgot. Uh-huh.)
She didn’t go down fighting because her weapon jammed. (US-issue weaponry often did that in Afghanistan because of the dust; Iraq has similar conditions.)
Her Iraqi doctors never slapped her around; quite the contrary, they saved her life and tried to turn her over to US troops–who shot at them.
“They used me as a way to symbolize all this stuff,” Lynch told Sawyer. “It’s wrong.”
By itself the elaborate Pentagon put-on isn’t that big a deal..although you have to wonder why they felt it was necessary to stage an elaborate shoot-’em-up “rescue” into an undefended hospital. Were they that desperate to make Iraq look like a real war?
The spinning of Jessica Lynch is just one of countless Bush Administration lies about Iraq, Afghanistan, the economy and their methods of governance. The pattern is the same: big boner of a lie, followed by cautious unmasking of the same by the media, which are then shouted down by faux “patriot” right-wingers, followed by the passage of a few months, culminating with the revelation that the cynics had it right all along. Naturally, the right-wingers never admit that they were, as they always, inexorably are, all along.
It’s boring, and funny, and stupid, all at the same time. And it’s amazing that the American people are putting up with it.
A Fine Dessert of Vengeance, Served with a Frosting of Comeuppance
Proving once again that comedy is tragedy experienced by someone else, I was amused to see that a bunch of former cartoonists for the New York Press, the right-wing alternative weekly in Manhattan, are bitching about how they’ve been treated in a whiny thread on The Comics Journal message board.
The Press has gone through a few changes as of late, having been sold by long-time owner Russ Smith. But some things never change: they’re a poorly-paying, arbitrary and capricious publication that loves, loves, loves you when they hire you and treat you like so much dog excrement when they inevitably boot your ass a few months or years later.
The paper did serve a purpose back during the early to mid ’90s, when it hired new artists and writers to do autobiographical essays about their sex lives or whatever, and also featured a lot of comics–about a dozen at one point–that were just starting out. While these were by no means the best the alternative press had to offer (those are now found in The Village Voice and like-minded publications), it was good to see a paper that understood that comics were a big reader draw.
I wrote a number of long cover essays for the Press, and eventually (I think it was 1997) Russ called me in to discuss running my cartoons. “We love the strip,” Russ said. Whatever. About six months later, he canceled it. That’s what the Press does.
The new editor, Jeff Koyen, is a real piece of work. I thought it would be amusing to send in a submission of sample columns–they don’t run in New York–to the Press a few weeks after they annointed me #2 on their list of “The 50 Most Loathesome New Yorkers,” ahead of Yoko Ono even! For some reason the editor of MAXIM made #1. Hey, they don’t like my politics, fine. No hard feelings from me.
Anyway, Koyen sends me a long suck-up email in response, promising to pick up my column and starts negotiations on how much he wants to pay. We go back and forth a bit, so I figure it’s time to call him on the phone to say hi. Which he does, but begs off for a few weeks because he’s busy doing something with another publication called Sports Express or something. Fine. I follow-up a few weeks later, he ducks my voicemails, I move on.
Then, in the Press’ “Best of New York” issue, Koyen publishes a screed full of lies, saying that I stalked his phones and how he never had any interest in my column, yadayadayada. Hey, he’s the guy who asked for rates. Bizarre. What was more telling, however, is that nobody mentioned it to me. New Yorkers don’t read the Press anymore. Still, I have to ask myself, what’s WITH this guy?
Part of me feels sorry for this batch of cartoonists getting screwed over by the Press. Then the other part remembers how they reacted when it happened to me. It only hurts, as Len Deighton said, when I larf.
300,000 New Jobs Created?
The good news, they tell us, is that the economy has created 300,000 new jobs in the last 3 months. The trouble is that the economy has to generate 400,000 new jobs a month just to stay even with layoffs and standard attrition of businesses going under, etc. The “good news,” in other words, is that the net loss of jobs has decreased from 400,000 per month to 300,000 per month. I suppose that’s good news…but calling it a recovery is a bit rich. A recovery, after all, needs to actually add jobs to the economy, not take them away…
This weekend is a big book deadline weekend, so I shan’t be blogging much.
