The Good News about Michael Bloomberg Is That He Won’t Bug You

Michael Bloomberg won’t be in the first primaries. He won’t be in the debates. He doesn’t have any policies. If he becomes president, he probably will never hear about him anymore than the people of New York heard from him when he was mayor. So maybe he would be a good president.

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  • I don’t drink pop at all anymore, so his expansion of his soda-pop tax nationwide won’t affect me at all. Hmm … maybe I should rethink my aversion to him.

  • We need a president like Tulsi, who will do her best to stop all the stupid wars. Sadly, we won’t get one.
    (Not that it’s clear anyone can: Trump has ordered all troops out of Syria. Three times. And they’re still there. The first time, they told him not to do it again. The second time, his Defence Secretary quit in disgust. The third time, they said it wasn’t about spreading freedom and democracy, it was about stealing all the oil, and Trump said he was OK with that.)

  • Bloomie does have an ideology, however. It shouldn’t be too hard to figure out what it is.

  • Ted, if you can guarantee that Mr Bloomberg as president won’t bug the rest of us – i e, the nearly 96 % who live outside your country’s borders, but are strongly affected by its policies and its claims to universal jurisdiction – then I’ll gladly intervene in your elections and work to see him elected…. 😉


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