Career Opportunities

Get aboard the job train: the jobs of the future are the jobs you don’t want.

6 thoughts on “Career Opportunities

  1. I especially liked the last frame – who says that people don’t realise when they’re getting bullshitted by the boob tube (pardon the double entendre !) ?…


  2. Dear someone – Please go to a hospital right now or clinic and admit yourself. With all your qualifications (qualifictions) and other stuff you can barely type or spell, your last post sounds like you are dangerously close to hurting people around you or doing something crazy. If you are truly this disturbed or angry, then get some help! – and Susan – lamely suggesting someone start a “school” or a “lemonade stand” is really thoughtless and contributes to the problem.

  3. @Susan: Well I am about 2 years (if they are good and productive ones) away from making a move at a Principle Investigator position potentially even at a tear one institution. If successful not only will I have the job I dreamed of since I was eight (no joke) but by average estimates my salary could go up by about two orders of magnitude within the next decade bringing me from poor to obnoxiously wealthy. Additionally with all the sacrifices I have made (permanently degraded health from working with phosgene among many other equally bad things, lost significant other of 8 years who I was planning on marrying because I was “always working”, most of my friends and some of my family for similar reasons, squandered my entire youth either studying or working, ect…) it is too late to turn back now after all that and especially when I am oh so close … and yet still so far…

    If that falls through (I’ll know for sure by 2020) then I’ll consider something else – but a school? I know they are important and children are our future and all, but I kind of despise kinds with all of my being. The sewer system is also really important to maintain and I am awfully thankful for the work and dedication of those who do maintain but I am not interested in joining their ranks. I could probably go into finance, but I don’t think I could live with myself if that happened. I think if the big goal falls through it would either be time to pull a “Breaking Bad” or become a suicide bomber. We shall see what the future holds.

  4. @Someone

    If you’ve got a PhD, then maybe you can start you’re own school? It won’t be accredited, I know. But if your subject matter is interesting enough, people will pay to be taught.

  5. This is awesome; definitely one of my favorite strips.

    One additional thing that few people talk about is that a lot of the industries “billowing with jobs you aren’t qualified for” actually aren’t. I have an advanced degree in a field that is supposed to confir employment and wealth, but I can tell you that is not really true. I make less then minimum wage, and I have it better then a significant number of my cohorts because at least I am employed.

    From what I have personally seen these industries have unfilled spot not because there aren’t enough qualified people, but because there aren’t enough qualified people who are also stupid and virgin to employment. What these industries want are people with the highest possible qualifications (six years in a PhD, plus an additional few years as a post doctoral research fellows, plus a couple years of unpaid internships in industry positions) who will work for minimum wage for at most ten years so that they can be denied both salary increases and their retirement packages. The sadest thing, is EVEN if you have all those qualifications and are still willing to work for being vastly underpaid for your qualifications, if you have had a technical job before, but have been fired, even if it was just to avoid raising your salary or keeping you from getting retirement benefits, you will have grave difficulty finding another technical job in the field because you are considered damaged goods forever more.

    If you think it is lack of qualified people that leaves openings in these fields, then tell that to the pool of unemployed PhDs most of whom, if when they end up finding jobs, don’t get them in academic or technical fields at all because there really aren’t any openings there despite the claims otherwise. Instead these people if they are lucky enough to find employment overwhelmingly do so in either finance or consulting, both of which, ironically, pay far better with far better benefits and fewer working hours and days.

    Here is a related article:

    Also if you don’t believe me go check out the giant pool of highly qualified PhD chemists sitting unemployed and ranting about their fate in the comments section here (these aren’t isolated individuals):

  6. I noticed that too. Some of the ads for the jobs, I can’t tell if they’re trying to talk me into applying or out of it. They have a lot in common with pharmaceutical ads in that way. May cause impotence, flatulence, blisters, difficulty concentrating, bad breath, excessive obedience, and violent diarrhea. (a nod to Olestra there)

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