What if we treated corporations the way they treat us?
Turning the Tables Around
Ted Rall
Ted Rall is a syndicated political cartoonist for Andrews McMeel Syndication, WhoWhatWhy.org and Counterpoint. He is a frequent contributor to The Wall Street Journal, a graphic novelist and author of many books of art and prose, and an occasional war correspondent. He is, recently, the author of the graphic novel "The Stringer."
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It's beautifully done and funny but it makes me sad, as well.
They only conduct business that way because they can.
Worse, even the employees of these companies don't like doing business that way, either. Like that Citibank employee–who looks very European for someone who works out of Hyderabad.
Those two guys need guns. Let's get them some guns and ammo.
Ahhh, the futility
I just got denied for treatment for something, typical response "it's not life threatening." Beyond the obvious, which is that they have no idea if it really is or not, is the idea that preventative treatment is simply not covered.
That is the consequence of profit based health services.
Nah! 'They' began this stuff with serious intentions to destroy America in the early seventies, when we committed the horrible crime of stopping a WAR! We had to be punished and PAY! Suddenly, there was a gas shortage. Then toilet paper prices doubled. Everything doubled. Then doubled again, and again, and again. The knife wounds continue. We are not yet bled out. But wait a bit. Won't be long now. Won't be long. When food and water are not available, we will destroy one another, then the 'survivors' will eat eachother, then the 'survivor-survivors' will grunt and walk on their knuckles. Yep, it's coming. We're all going to DIE!
Not to worry. The next G20 circle jerk is being held where I live (!), so after September, the leaders of the world will have been converted to yinzers who only care about sports, beer and pierogies and the White House press corps jagoffs who laughed at the choice will have choked on their words and will have taken honest jobs in the "service industry". Former adversaries will come together over a shared love of the Stillers and Pens (go Pens!), and World War III is basically going to be a tailgate grill-off. People will talk about (and history will ultimately be measured as) Before Pittsburgh and After Pittsburgh. Or didn't you know that the Point created by the Confluence of Three Rivers is pictured on the Mayan Calendar? Look it up. Also, Noam Chomsky has already turned down an invitation to speak at a protest (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette Sunday May 31) because he knows he won't be needed.
Change is coming.
Perhaps a more honest and effective approach to the situation would be a kind of self-repossession: rent a moving van, fill it with everything you've bought on credit, drive it to each creditor's closest branch office, and dump it all there for them to deal with. Oh, and then stop making payments.
Imagine the mayhem! Banks and corporations would be scrambling to find ways to keep people from bringing their stuff back…including forgiving their loans.
Good one. However, the cartoon is pure fantasy. IT IS NOT REAL! Americans don't challenge the big corporations; Americans challenge nothing…
phil is right.
I send bills to Citi, Dish Network and others all the time. If I call them on the phone for service that is supposedly available either by advertisement on their website or via their terms of service and it takes more than 10 minutes to speak with someone, I start recording the amount of my time that they are wasting and then I invoice them at an hourly rate of $100 (paying me my current salary, plus the fractional cost of my home office, phone, etc). So far they haven't paid me, but at least I sent the invoices!
The Reverend Mr. Smith is onto something here…give them all a free day pass to Kennywood just to make sure the transformation sticks.
Seth Warren: Just checked your profile. I didn't realize you were in the Paris of the Appalachians. Good call on the Kennywood tickets. Let's redd up the world! The Middle East needs fixed, too.